Too many words for a story
So, as the web already knows, Wired has printed a loada six-word stories, and Slashdot has fostered loads more.
I give you:
Death became her. Resurrection angered her.
Isambard Kingdom Brunel stepped from the –
Birth. Death. Sold sandwiches in between.
Red-hooded girl defeats transvestite wolf.
I. Angry Achilles avenges Patroclus, killing Hector.
II. Odysseus has adventures getting home (uncuckolded).
a. Hamlet dithers after uncle murders Dad.
b. Never never trust your daughters (sometimes).
c. Magician trains monster. Avenges family. Retires.
d. Witches correctly predict Scottish royal bloodbath.
“Policeman” revelation spoils long-running play.
Plane crash. Mysterious island. Interminably unexplained.
POISONED KEYBOARD KILLS HEADLINE WRITER SHOCKE…
So, c’mon people, let’s have yours.
January 1st, 1970 at 12:00 am
January 1st, 1970 at 12:00 am
October 26th, 2006 at 10:11 am
I went to a Chinese restaurant.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:15 am
Monosodium glutamate gunged up your innards?
October 26th, 2006 at 10:20 am
Republican victory unthwarted by claimed paternity
October 26th, 2006 at 10:21 am
Possible, but not yet fully determined.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:27 am
Whale-pursuit futile, misguided, ultimately fatal
October 26th, 2006 at 10:28 am
Dorothy had a pretty wack dream.
Alice had an even wacker dream.
Duncan Grisby nodded in silent admiration.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:28 am
One-legged monomaniac captains futile vendetta?
October 26th, 2006 at 10:29 am
Gods forge, lose, regain Ring, die.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:29 am
Listen. Numerous quaint Welsh characters interact.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:30 am
Nice!
Hairy-foooted munchkin completes Ring-dumping.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:31 am
War happens. Then peace happens, briefly.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:31 am
My father wrote a children’s version of Moby Dick when I was sixish, with as its star an Irish whale called Dopey Mick. I’m not sure to this day this isn’t the Funniest Thing in the World Ever.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:32 am
Proletariat overcomes elite, briefly. Cycle continues.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:33 am
Wow! Any chance of excavating it? Sounds fantastic!
October 26th, 2006 at 10:33 am
Jews escape slavery, murder messiah, disperse.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:34 am
Time travelling whale pursuit saves world.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:36 am
Or, “Seamus drunkenly delivers mimed PowerPoint presentation.”
October 26th, 2006 at 10:37 am
Britt Ekland goes slap, wobble, slap.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:39 am
Tea sought; earth instead rediscovered, exploded
October 26th, 2006 at 10:41 am
*claps with glee*
October 26th, 2006 at 10:42 am
98TH LEGION UNDER QUINTUS TAKES TENOCHTITLAN
“Hi. Meet my wife and husbands.”
IN the beginning, Satan created God.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:43 am
Hee hee, I knew this would get you working!
October 26th, 2006 at 10:45 am
Lord’s shepherd duped into fiery cage.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:46 am
Poor first impressions. Man improves manners.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:47 am
Man donates rib. Gets nagged thereafter.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:54 am
There are many sorts of cat.
October 26th, 2006 at 10:57 am
Stuffed bear sits in the woods.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:01 am
My valet pacifies my aunts, again.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:03 am
My other head plots against me.
“Her dying wish,” sighed King Albert.
Nanoterrorism is so passe these days.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:05 am
Empress kidnapped. Turns out she’s porcine.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:06 am
A contemporary review of “Waiting for Godot” summarised the play as “Nothing happens, nobody comes, nobody goes”, which I think fits the bill (as the pelican said to the pigeon).
Me, I can only do bland genre fiction:
Romance: “Boy meets girl with inevitable results.”
Chicklit: “Girl meets boy, but prefers chocolate.”
Crime: “One of us was the killer.”
SF/Fantasy: “Look! Like Earth, but different.”
Modern novel: “Got up. What if that’s all?”
October 26th, 2006 at 11:07 am
Time-travelling Nemo figure stubbornly Earthbound.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:10 am
Postmodern: “The book was six words long.”
The Hero’s Journey: “Set out, got help, restored equilibrium.”
October 26th, 2006 at 11:13 am
Oulipo: “A B’ed C. D E’d B.”
Perec: “Man lost summat not consonantal. Oh?”
October 26th, 2006 at 11:15 am
Pansexual superhero strangely lacklustre. In Cardiff.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:16 am
Jane Errs: “Reader, I shagged him.”
October 26th, 2006 at 11:18 am
So true, alas.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:21 am
What maketh a man? Me! Muwhahahahaha…
October 26th, 2006 at 11:24 am
Baker Street residents transpose, eluding Dan
October 26th, 2006 at 11:25 am
Lonely golem terrorises bots on ice…
October 26th, 2006 at 11:25 am
Tee hee!
October 26th, 2006 at 11:32 am
Villager massacre pre-empts lycanthrope/nosferatu denouement
October 26th, 2006 at 11:33 am
“You fucker,” cries Dan, forever memorably.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:38 am
Author, fixing wilful limits, cramps opuses.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:39 am
Assuming Dan has no work to do (and I always favour this assumption) it must be killing him that he can’t join in! Tee hee.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:49 am
This is how you use Illustrator.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:50 am
(It’s funnier with the hand gestures.)
October 26th, 2006 at 12:06 pm
Poet celebrates
Freedom of constraint
Gleefully.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:07 pm
,” said Seamus of his canine relationship.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:13 pm
He’s out of the office today so he’s being spared.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:19 pm
However, haiku
need heptasyllables and
pentasyllables.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:22 pm
“Out of office” message covers fury.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:25 pm
Good point:
Celebratory,
Poets embrace constraining,
Gleefully fettered.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:28 pm
Brevity proven not soul of wit.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:40 pm
“Let that go,” dullard thankfully concluded.
October 26th, 2006 at 2:17 pm
Lady weaves, sighs,
sees Lancelot, dies.
October 26th, 2006 at 2:38 pm
Blimey: it tells a story, in only six words, and rhymes! Whatever next?
October 26th, 2006 at 2:57 pm
like it!
October 26th, 2006 at 3:18 pm
Some confusion between syllables and words crept in there, alas. Just the Return of the King one, then, I think:
Hobbits overcome
Saruman; ending (alas!)
Interminable.
I’m going back to the first two.
October 26th, 2006 at 4:50 pm
I provide foil to detective, again.
(Henry hasn’t got a LiveJournal, still.)
October 26th, 2006 at 7:28 pm
Here’s the last 3 books I’ve read:
Man becomes monster, intermittently at first
Diamond stolen from god, eventually returned
Fortune lost? Become teacher then marry.
October 26th, 2006 at 7:33 pm
Greek: “Hamartia; peripeteia; anagnorisis; catharsis (audience escapes).”
October 26th, 2006 at 9:02 pm
And then the duck bit me.
October 27th, 2006 at 8:06 am
Dog dies. Dad done did it.
October 27th, 2006 at 8:15 am
Nice!